you are not working are you? Tsk Tsk

met a boy today who at the ripe old age of 21 has got bored of drinking, smoking and smoking pot...he still smokes but with this disintersted air of a 40 year old. Instead he gets his kicks out of playing the stock market and tells me how he lost six times my annual salary in three hours. He also has what I term the post-post modern relationship with a girl who like any normal Indian sex deprived girl wants to get it on but is faced with polite yawns. THIS is what happens if you carry a hip flask to school, smoke behind the basketball court and get all the girls too early.
Instead you should have parents like my dad who despite the casualness of email, 10 years of relatively frank bonhomie and late night calls everyday still sends mails that would make a lawyer blink twice "requesting" me to have my milk in the morning.

I have a cold...the fifth one of this year which means 25 days have been spent this year, sniffling and feeling sorry for myself. And smelling everything from eucalyptus and melted Vicks vapo rub in water.
To make matters worse Hindustan Times just completed 100 days in Mumbai and since they can't legally torture anyone to celebrate this conquest, they are making do by putting a hideous bright red and yellow HT CELEBRATES 100 DAYS wallpaper on every computer, which we can't remove for the next 15 days. It will be their fault when hordes of people call in sick.
On the bright side, they will be vomitting food cooked in our very own pantry. Yup we can go down and order cheese toasties and poha and lunch whenever we want till 9 in the night and it doesn't cost the bomb. All in all life has regained normal grey hued dreariness with sparks of light and hope in the middle if you look closely.

Presenting Mallu rap....

Yaa, MC Vikram and Luda Krishna representing y'all,
That's right ... increase the volume please ... thank you.

Welcome to India, mango juices and lassis, samosa crazy desis
and little kids that are milking the bhainses.
Toothbrush in my pocket, what is that?
We use our fingers here to keep our teeth so clear, who said that?

Luda Krishna here, Vikram pulling the Tata gears,
and I am sitting in the Maruti Supreme
with the cooling glass on, no one bothers me,
biggest stars since the ever famous Mamooty.

Come with me to a place where we sip Frooties,
and we eat the sweets while monkeys roam the streets.
Old uncle sits - big bellies and burps smelly (burp!)
Thank you Vikram, would you please pass the jelly,

I walked into the local corner-store,
bought myself a very nice looking carroms board.
My fingers get sore when I shoot and I score,
and the ladkis all scream coz they all want some more,
of the Luda Krishna and the Vikram MC,
Sweetest thing to hit the States since mango chutney.
We keep the kundis shaking, you better trust me.
The name is Luda Krishna, but my friends call me Thambi, watch!! (burp!)

Welcome to India where the cows eat hay,
and we drive auto-rickshaws everyday,
Goat meats, yummy sweets, wild monkeys roaming,
The roosters don't crow till five in the morning! (2x)
Now the kundis don't jiggle till I'm rapping,
So please don't pass the gas when you're laughing.

Up the music charts like mango trees I climb,
With a smooth voice like mine, is it a crime?
Representing FOB-iness since ninety-seven
Rap maharaja, I don't work at 7-Eleven.
Throw your hands in the air if you've got facial hair,
Not just for the guys, c'mon ladies be fair!

I'm the MFP - Most FOB-ious Player,
Wearing hot lungis, do you think I really care?
Monday night - computer club
Tuesday night - at Akbaar grocery saying "Sweet thang, what is up?"
Wednesday - I'm out making rupees
Thurday - On lookout for Bharatnatyam queen
Friday - Everybody must know where I'm at,
coz I'm chilling on the field with my big cricket bat.
Saturday - my farts are breezy ...
believe me, so strong they will get you mad dizzy,
Sunday - Yaar, I cannot start weeping
because on Monday I will start the creeping ... Hallo!

Oh, oh, go Luda, go Luda.
Ah, it's my birthday!
That is your birthday, man!
Yaaaaah. You go boy!
Oh oh oh ... it's great!
Ah, Indian honor my friend. Good night!

Have just discovered a brilliant new author, Garth Nix. Picked up Sabriel, the first book in his trilogy set in The Old Kingdom where stable and pure Charter Magic is disrupted by the powerful and dangerous power of Free Magic used by sorcerers and necromancers to help dead things cross over to Life. The only necromancer who instead binds the dead and banishes them beyond the Ninth and Final Gate of Death is the Abhorsen. A title passed from parent to child. Sabriel, the daughter of Abhorsen knows little of what this entails but is forced to find out when her father is trapped in Death and one of the Greater Dead threatens to cross over. The first orginal piece of fantasy writing I have seen in a long time.

I went to kerala! but more about that later when I am in cal for TEN days doing blissfully nothing at all. For now enjoy picture